Turn to the next Paige

Thursday, December 06, 2007

The winter air is cold...and bitter...

If you haven't had the chance to read Joe's blog (http://www.heyitsjoe.blogspot.com) I HIGHLY suggest you do so....I have been having a hard time with the church that my family has been visiting the past year or so. His post, which derives from another friend's blog and observations on modern church society, is pretty much right on point.

Let me start off that I was personally raised in a very, VERY tiny church that my grandfather is a Deacon in. I never had much of a youth group but the simplicity and graciousness of my church raised to me to appreciate the Word of God instead of the glitter that churches now feel they have to decorate all around. I feel that churches now have to do this in order to achieve some kind of "hip" relevance with modern society. I have a big problem with this. My sister and I have had discussions of these issues since we have witnessed corruption...no....complete ARROGANCE and BLINDNESS of a church that takes money and status over the congregation. Wait...no...the absolute truth of what a church should be about. And it is not just about the monstrous churches...but seriously...where do we go wrong??

I could go on about what we have witnessed but I have to hold back my anger and focus it toward making a change within ME. It is not the church's fault but the growing ignorance of people like me who may think that just because a "church" says so...that makes it right. I am by far not perfect in my walk with Jesus Christ. As I sit here my eyes are tearing up because I can see my own faults and my constant neglect towards Him. My focus can easily be distracted and my personal relationship with Him has been cut off to some extent. When my time comes, I will not be standing with a congregation. I will be standing alone and I will see the life that I lived. Maybe this is "Fire and Brimstone" type of thinking but it breaks my heart to see the decisions I have made this far. I think of my words that I have expressed to people, the actions I should have taken, the actions I should NOT have taken, the thoughts of personal gain that burn my brain, the hand I should have lended...the list goes on.

I guess maybe the only thing I can ask is just to whisper a small prayer for me...like I should always do for you.

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